Are Penguins Planning On Taking Over The World?

I spent Christmas at a little sea side town called Betty's Bay this year. While I was there I visited the local penguin colony. There must have been thousands of these smelly dodgy looking penguins there and it got me thinking - what if penguins are planning on taking over the world? Think about it for a moment. While a lot of people are awaiting the overthrow of the human race by zombies, robots or aliens, they would never expect this. While we continue gawking at them with wide, admiring eyes at the aquarium, we might be doing so without knowing that we are admiring our own downfall. What we refer to as their so called cuteness is probably just the penguins' way of masking their master plan of world domination. They're cute and they know it. They've also been boxed into zoos and aquariums long enough to know that cuteness is a human's weakness. So while we're distracted by their adorableness, their little penguin brains continue to ruminate...and plot... and scheme.

Egyptian pictures used to be just things that I looked at to admire their artistry and craftsmanship. Now I am taking the time to think about what some of these pictures might might actually mean.Take this picture on the left for example. What it looks like to me is a penguin like creature sitting on the shoulders of a man with its flippers hanging over the guys chest. The mans face is covered by the penguins. Which would probably mean that the penguin is more important than the man. Only the mans body is important, that is why one sees his body. The man's body is important to the penguin for mobility. The man has a hat on that holds a white bottle.

Now I was thinking to myself, that isn't a penguin, but it sure looks like one and it is kind of coloured like one too. It got me thinking that maybe the ancient Egyptians worshiped these penguins, and since I was schooled by nuns, or penguins as we kids called them, I wondered if the worship of these penguins might have been carried over into the Christian faith.

Anyway, it's not a penguin from earth. And if it's not a penguin from earth than what is it? And why is it making the man carry a bottle of something above the penguin, sort of like a gravity fed IV bottle. Which leads me to conclude, the bottle probably contains hemoglobin,which is oxygen rich blood. The penguin needs that because its not from our planet, it needs more oxygen than we do.

And since the guy is carrying it around on his shoulders, and his face is not shown, he is not as important as the penguin, and the penguin is in charge.

So my theory is that the pyramids were built for and designed by outerspace penguins as some sort of outerspace penguin nesting, brooding, or hatchery area in what was their initial invasion.

Perhaps a second invasion is now underway. I mean think about it people they already control one whole continent Antarctica! Does anyone really know what these penguins get up to in Antactica? For all we know they are building secret weapons there. And now that I think about it didn't global warming start in Antarctica? The penguins are probably deliberately melting the ice to raise the sea level.

As if that wasn't bad enough they have now started spreading and taking over another three continents in South America, Africa and Australasia. Too top it off they now seem to have started infiltrating the media. The last few years have seen penguins popping up in numerous movies such as March of the Penguins, Happy Feet and Mr. Popper's Penguins. It is highly likely that they are using the media to brainwash us. If they carry on like this who knows what language we'll be speaking in 20 years time.

I suspect that penguins may also be involved in numerous mysterious disasters like the Crash of the Hindenburg, the Pearl Harbour attack and the sinking of the Titanic.

So far their plan for world domination seems to have been a bloodlessaffair with most humans sub consciously accepting them as their new masters. There can be no doubt about it, penguins are going to take over the world! It's just a matter of time before their reinforcements from space arive and they conquer the rest of earth.

Spoof article written by Colin Chaplin.